What is symbiosexuality? Feeling attracted to established couples rather than individuals
The study suggests that attraction can extend beyond one-to-one dynamics to a collective, cohesive whole.
Traditionally, desire and attraction are directed towards individuals, but an interesting study reveals an existing, yet far lesser-known phenomenon: the attraction to established couples. Published in the Archives of Sexual Behavior and authored by Sally W. Johnston, the study explores this intriguing concept, known as symbiosexuality.
Instead of being drawn to the individuals in the relationship, symbiosexuals are attracted to the dynamics and energy of the relationship between them. This familiar yet novel concept offers a new understanding of the complexity of human attraction.
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Attraction to the whole
Symbiosexuality is oriented towards the chemistry of an established couple. The sexual attraction is towards the couple's unified cohesion, charisma, power, and dynamics. This energy exudes from how the individuals in the relationship interact and engage with each other.
The synergy of the partnership is appealing to them, and they want to be a part of this dynamic. They are in ‘love’ with the love between the two people in the relationship and want to immerse themselves in that love. It’s multidimensional because it’s richer in terms of complex shared experiences and emotions that add more depth to the energy of the group. There’s a sense of power through mutual trust and support, which symbiosexuals are drawn to.
Symbiosexuals date the energy of the relationship. The author explained how it’s a genuine desire towards the ‘whole’ of the relationship. The unique attraction can be described as “greater than the sum of its parts.” The attraction that symbiosexual individuals feel toward couples highlights the appeal of the combined energy and dynamic power that emerge from the romantic partnership of two people. Symbiosexuality is much like any other type of sexuality, albeit lesser known, and can be found in diverse age groups, racial groups, socio-economic classes, and gender identities.
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Unknown, yet familiar
Symbiosexuals are often stigmatised in both monogamous and non-monogamous communities. Symbiosexuality is given the label of ‘unicorn’ in literature. However, this same term has a negative connotation in non-monogamous communities, which points to individuals who are willing to engage in sex and relationships with couples. It generally refers to bisexual women who are interested in a relationship with existing couples. It does not indicate a real attraction, and instead invalidates the symbiosexuals' genuine attraction and feelings toward the energy of the couple, as a whole. The lack of proper descriptors for this kind of attraction makes the symbiosexuals struggle to articulate their feelings properly and question the normal nature of this attraction. Human desire is complex and symbiosexuality shows human desire is not merely restricted to one-to-one attraction.