Therapist suggests 8 ingredients of a secure relationship. How many can you check off your list?

A healthy and secure relationship demands healthy communication, understanding, loyalty, trust and transparency. It requires both partners to be equally invested in the relationship to ensure a safe space for exchange of emotions. In a secure relationship, the partners are securely attached. This requires constant effort and work.

“It’s important to note that each person will have varying levels of these needs as well as ways that they would like them met. Use this list as a way to assess which area may need more attention. After you identify what’s missing, work on figuring out if you’re responsible for meeting those needs or if it’s something you require from the other person,” wrote Therapist Sadaf Siddiqi in a recent social media post.

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Autonomy:

While a relationship demands that we run by our choices and decisions with the other person, we should ensure to have that space where we are in complete control of the choices we make.

Acceptance:

Not always we are going to be onboard with everything that the partner says – however, when we learn to accept them for who they are, we understand them better.

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Security:

The space to share our emotions without being afraid of criticism or reactiveness helps us to feel safe physically and emotionally in a relationship.

Empathy:

We should ensure to create a space of empathy and affection in the relationship – this will help us to understand the emotions of the partner better.

Affection:

Showing physical affection, or through warm and loving words helps the other person to feel valued and appreciated in the relationship.

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Connection:

From sharing goals and ambitions to being curious to understand the partner – all of it converges to enhance emotional connection in a relationship.

Support:

Through our words, actions, presence and attention, we should be able to convince the partner that we are always there for them.

Respect:

This is one of the basic components of a secure relationship. There should be mutual respect in a relationship - even at times when we may not agree with them.